Absinthe Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

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Twenty Major

Twenty Major was born some years ago in Dublin, Ireland. He lives on, or around, the South Circular Road with a dog called Bastardface and a cat called Throatripper. He spent his formative years on the streets of Dublin playing football, kick the can and robbing blind people with collection tins. After many years of training he became the youngest fully qualified shepherd in Ireland and by the time he was thirty he was a Shepherd Master. His best friend is called Jimmy the Bollix and they drink, on a daily basis, in Ron's bar. He was nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize in 1984 but was beaten to the gong by Bishop Desmond Tutu who ran a vigorous dirty tricks campaign against him. He has never forgiven Tutu and will one day have his revenge. His other mortal enemies include Daryl Hall, LL Cool J (who stole his rap) and any kind of clown. Twenty Major wrote a daily blog at www.twentymajor.net which was amongst the most widely read and popular in Ireland.